2 years ago I wrote a social media post basically demanding everyone stop calling me Dora. It was a nickname I received right before I had kids that eventually gave me what felt like a drowning identity crisis.
Fast forward towards the end of my marriage & it started to feel like it was a way for too many people tothis nickname to feel less remorse about the garbage that they spewed. It made me feel like I was walking around with a veil on. Like people could say whatever they wanted about me or to me and they felt justified because they weren’t actually seeing me as a real person. I was disguised behind this mask, this nickname that I had had for 10years.
I initially only shared the post to Instagram for the sole purpose of I was scared and I had less of his family and acquaintances on there. I woke up the next day and just said FUCK THIS and hit the share to FB button. I was sick of hiding, I was sick of playing small and I was sick of being scared of the repercussions and kickback of a post like that, me standing up for myself publicly, where everyone could see and screenshot it.
It was really a small gesture but a huge step in me taking my life back. Me owning who I really am and who I want to be going forward. It was insanely liberating for being such a small gesture.
That original Instagram post popped up in my memories this morning and I just smiled. The insanely good feedback I got and encouragement I received from other people was shocking. I was being congratulated! I had friends and former family telling me good job and they were proud of me. I had people coming up to me telling me they felt like they needed that kick in the ass for themselves in a round about way. I felt validated, I felt and still do feel empowered.
I was so scared to take by my identity and I ended up inspiring others. It was one of the hardest posts I’ve made thus far and it awakened a huge vulnerability in me. I’m not scared to say what or how I feel anymore. I’m not scared to stand my ground. I’m not scared anymore who I piss off or what someone is going to say about me. I’m not a scared little girl anymore, intimidated by false threats and empty words.
I’m strong as fuck and it scares the shit out of him. I couldn’t be more proud of myself.
Danielle Bitz 